Pop Cycles

Parker and I tend to go trough the same cycle most days. He wakes me up in the morning, "Daddy get up, get me out." To which I respond, "Go to sleep, daddy wants to sleep!" during the day, he emails me at work, "lkasdf(87@(*&@>po9usa/" and I email him back, "your silly Parker." When I get home from work, he runs to me, gives me a hug and says, "Let's RUN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" At bedtime we sing and dance and read. Then, after I put him in his bed, I hear him singing, dancing and pretending to read. Before I go to bed, I get him up to go to the potty, after which I ask him if he is tired. He says, "Parker tired, go to sleep" (Why can't he just say that in the morning?)

At Work With Papa

Parker heard that his grandfather, or Papa (Necaise), was a manager for an electric company. He then asked, "What does he do there?" I told him that Papa was a lot of people's boss, so he asked me, "What does he make them do?" I thought that was a good question, so I answered as best as I could, telling him that the people that worked for Papa helped make sure that a bunch of other people had power in their houses so that they could play computer games and watch movies. He was amazed, "So, Papa is like the most important person in the world, isn't he." (Was that a question?)

Up, Up and Away

Well, I guess that it was only a matter of time before his mutant abilities showed themselves (we did name him after a superhero after all). To the untrained eye it may look like he has just jumped on the bed and the photographer caught him in the act, but truth be told, he is really levitating. That's not the only ability he has either. I think he is also a telepath (he has a tremendous ability to control our behavior and our time management).

Mermaids and Speedos

Parker is in love with fish and the water. I am afraid that he going to grow up like Tom Hanks in that movie "Mermaid" (not the crappy sequel that he wasn't in) and be in love with a mermaid. Its either that or an Olympic swimmer (not sure which is worse - tails or speedon'ts).

Adventures in Scale

Parker and Copper enjoy the zoo. They are amazed at the size and power of the elephant, and by the delicacy and grace of the ducks. They realize that in this world things exist at all scales, from vast continents to sub-atomic particles, and that their place, is somewhere in the middle. They understand that their role is to act, and to be acted upon in this thing we call life, so that their lives become intertwined with the lives of others in a meaningful way. They know, that as small as they are, their influence is vast. At least, that is what they said (they sound like raving lunatics to me).

The Results of Labor Law Violations

I must admit, that at first we were quite concerned about how tired Parker was. We thought that maybe we had over done it. Not that there was anything wrong with asking him (with a little compulsion mixed in) to rake the neighbor's yard, walk my boss's dogs, assemble concrete formwork, weld together the steel frame of a 70,000 sqft building, or to make cookies for the new cookie store we opened at the mall. But it was probably a little bit ambitious for one week's worth of work. All the same, we were starting to worry about how little energy he had. That is when our next great idea hit us. We went out for a night on the town and sure enough, when we came home, he was right were we left him (Oh, next week is going to be a good one too).

And Still more Labor Law Violations

Grandpa just couldn't stand what we were doing with our son. He said, "hiring him out to the highest bidder just isn't right. I brought his mother into this world, and she borned him, so I deserve at least a 50% cut." So, he put parker to work washing the neighbors' cars for 20 bucks a pop.

More Child Labor Law Violations

It is a good thing Parker enjoys working so much. And it certainly doesn't hurt that he loves tractors. So when his Great Uncle said he wanted some help cutting his grass, we hired him out. But don't worry, he gets his cut (all he wanted was to ride the tractor).

Child Labor: A Little Green Thumb

Recently, we have made a decision to get something out of our investment in Parker's Childhood. Honestly, we have been operating in the red; changing diapers, feeding and clothing him, buying him toys and books, and giving him the lavish amount of candy that he demands on a daily basis. So, we put him to work. He is now the Chief Landscaper of the Hansen Estate.

Making Mountains out of Mole Hills

To be honest with you, I don't really know if he is getting up or going down either. He may be digging a whole. Really I just don't know.

Football Star

Ladies and Gentlemen, I present to you the great hope for American soccer, Parker Adam Hansen. (He'll be a real threat just as soon as he can learn how to keep himself from pooping in his pants after running full tilt for 15 minutes.)

And Still They are not Safe

To the innocent creatures caged, Parker & Cooper appear quite docile and meek. However, the rabbits should count themselves amongst the most blessed of all creatures, having shelter and refuge from two demons whose fury and anger knows no bounds. If there were indeed no separation between the aggressor and the potential victims, these demons would attach with great ferocity (or maybe they would just run away scared of the little bunnies, really that is probably more likely than not).

Parker's Unspoken Truths - Part One

"My dad is an architect, (really he is an intern architect, which means that he gets to draw stairs, windows and urinals for a living) and a darn adequate one at that. And while I share his same talents, (and anal obsession for perfection at the expense of others sanity) I have a greater sense of ambition. To me, designing buildings is only one step above building with legos, or tinker toys (and let's face it, any two year old can do that). I want to create things that move, and move fast, things that make a lot of noise and call attention to itself, things that have complex pieces and need more advance methods of assembly to be put together; something like sports cars or school buses. And just to make my dad feel better about all of this, and to remind him how lucky he is to have me for his son I'm going to let him think that he is teaching me everything I need to know about design and building (but don't worry, I won't listen to any of it.)"

Running Punks

Recently I told Parker that Patrick and I were going to run a 15K in November and would start training in earnest. He burst into a fit of laughter that immediately brought him to tears! (The nerve of that little punk!) "Daddy," he said, "you better start running now, it might take you till then to finish." (It stung, but then again the truth always does.) "Tell you what," he continued, "Copper and I will run it for you, and spare you the embarrassment."

Patterns of Perfection

For those of you who don't know me, I am just a wee bit OCD. And a little bit anal retentive as well. I like these clean and simple, not complicated. Straight lines are better than curves, and so on. Simplicity if beauty. I suppose I was brainwashed in architecture school, or maybe it is just true that architects are right, all of the time, about everything. Whatever it is, my tendencies are to further the indoctrination and help others see the world as I do, a chaos waiting for someone to subdivide it and put it in the appropriate folder. So all I need to say further is that I am proud of my son, who is already picking up on the fact that chairs, when lined against the wall in perfect repetition, have a certain type of beauty to them.

Hunting for Quality, not Quantity

Don't get me wrong, Parker is faster than spider-man, but when it comes to hunting for Easter Eggs he moves very slowly. He likes to look for the eggs in spots where he knows they are least likely to be smashed or cracked by the other children who are all looking to get more Easter eggs than everyone else. Parker simply wants to find the best, the coolest, and most impressive egg and then he will flaunt it, and taunt them. Perhaps he appreciates all of the time craftsmen and Easter Bunnies put in to making those amazing eggs, or maybe he is just conserving his energy for the best part of the hunt, the inevitable destruction of all things Easter Egg.

Chillin with Dirtbag

"Papa is a dirtbag." At least that is what Parker thinks about it. Of course, it is only fair that I mention that I have caught Papa on more than one occasion coaching Parker on nicknames for the entire family: Mommy is "Big Meanie", Daddy is "Full of #@*!", Grandma Necaise is "The crazy woman who never sits down" and Grandpa Necaise is the "Dirtbag" which I spoke of earlier" (everyone else is just known as "stupid").

Anne, Roy & Evan

Parker very early formed in his mind, an understanding of the concept of association. He would see a rubber duck and say, "duck, quack quack." Should he see another duck, he would first group them together, and then say, two ducks, quack quack." He understands that all items with which he plays are "toys" and also that all who play with him are his "buddies." Recently, his ability to associate has increased significantly with the added understanding that two unlike objects can have a more abstract relationship to one another. As Stacey dropped me off at work several days ago, one of my bosses drove up right behind us. Parker saw her get out of the car, and immediately he recognized her, "Anne, Anne, Anne, Anne," he then said without prompting or seeing anyone else, "Roy (this is Anne's husband and partner in their firm)" and then concluded by saying, "Evan, Evan (Evan is Parker's buddy pictured above)." It was amazing to see him understand that each of these people are individuals and have a unique identity, but also belong to one another as a family. (Next we are going to work on the concept of authority.)

The Growing Artist - Part Five

This is an example of Parker's latest artistic endeavor: performance motion capture photography.

In Memphis Part Four

On Parker's last day in Memphis he finally got to see what he had been waiting for, the city skyline (actually, it is what I really wanted to see, but I had to experience it vicariously through these photos.) He and his Grandmeh strolled around the penthouse roof top plaza enjoying the cool crisp air of Memphis (notice I didn't mention the adjective "fresh".) It was here that Parker experienced the strangest thing about Memphis all together, the penthouse & the roof top plaza didn't belong to the buildings owners, or to some important client or guest, but to the pets. You don't have to be a student of real estate to understand that this arrangement is quite nice (and pricey), but yet somehow the ducks can afford it. Parker says, "in a town where businessmen get paid too much to do too little, it shouldn't seem too odd that pets get such a good deal for such a short life."